HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE

there were so many things recently that i did not do or wadsoever becos of what has happened at home..

• i havent gone for saturday self training for a very long time..
• i have yet to go for night study with ANYONE! my life is like so sad.
• i didnt go to the band concert last night cos i was fighting with mummy. and i really did not want to! it has been some time where i went out decently with my friends in home clothes! or at least not after school. i think my life is really screwed. i cant go where ever i wanna. only 10% of my request would be approved by them anyway. i dunno how to survive this man. IM 17! YOU CANT CONTROL ME ANYMORE!
• supposed to go study this morning and watch fireworks with yj. cos he asked me to go with him. im like damn happy. but damn! here i am. blogging. god knows why im still stuck at home. im sorry >.<

im stuck in this bloody place where ppl call me selfish when they themselves are the ones who want to selfishly keep me for themselves. they just cant accept that their daughter has grown and no longer will be willing to stick to them anymore. i need MY life! this sucks right to the core.

and currently. yj is not replying my msg >.<

no amt of pool can chill me out right now. who ever that talks to me now will just get attitude by me. thats why i choose to appear offline. I WANT TO FLY! but my legs are chained. shit la. 17 al still kena chained. damn it. im seriously so angry. or.. im just angry cos the other person is yj this time and he matters so much to me. wadever.

anw im stuck here and thats the truth. YJ! sorry la. dun go find other ppl go with you kay. *im keeping my fingers cross. i'd rather you study alone at home! haha! so selfish of me right. hais. i got a very strong feeling that he is alr now out there with some other ppl doing wad should be done with me.. i hope my feeling is wronfg for once.. and.. maybe cos he cant find anyone to go with him thats why he came to me. and now that i cant go with him he finds someone else. im feeling so damned. i can imagine myself looking at the spectecular fireworks tgt with him and all. but now.. fuck.

kay. im going to emo at one corner alr.. fuck the national day parade la.

i just hope that when im looking at fireworks from the tv.. you're looking at the same one too.. and please tel me that when you were looking at the fireworks.. you were thinking of me..

im sorry. i'll see a meteor shower with you next time..

ex: "move on.. i keep telling myself that." yes. i do not know if you are refering to me.. but if you are and you happen to read this post. pls move on.. thou i'll miss you and all the memories.. when the goodbye is said.. we cant turn back. MOVE ON.. i know you can..